sugars and weighing

138 this morning! I'm also certain that I've lost some weight since my last visit with the clinical trial people last week.

My last official weigh in was 239 after a month on the new meds. I don't weigh every day, and my scale is wildly and variably inaccurate anyway. Weighing every day can create false hope on the one hand and unnecessary despair on the other there are just too many variables.

The real goal is to have a plan in place that is working and just live and have it be something that happens in the background, not so fast that its worrisome. I was about to say 'and not so slow that ...' but I'm not sure there is a 'not so slow'. I've lost weight several times and put it all back on and more because my habits didn't change. There were times I'd lose a bunch over a few weeks and feel weird about it, like it was wrong, like I was in danger.

I think my pace is about a half pound a week or so, 2-3 pounds a month. That is plenty good enough. I'm getting the rewards of feeling clothes be a little looser and things fitting better. The numbers on the scale matter, of course, I would like to get back to 190 pounds or so, which is about 50 from where I am now. I'll be on these meds for two years, that's how long the trial is, so if I can lose a half a pound a week I'll get there in two years. Of course, I don't expect that to be continuous, I'll probably lose more up here then when I'm down there, and if I end up at 200 I won't be crying about it. From the perspective of the disease that will be a huge advantage, and although it won't be skinny -- 165 would be rail thin for me -- I will have dropped out of the 'obese' scale and into 'normal, but a few extra pounds'.